"Stranger! if you, passing, meet me, and desire to speak to me, why should you not speak to me?"1
Leet this be my apology for speaking to you with my heart laid bare—I
tried very hard to secure a copy of your "Leaves", and at last in New York did so, I
took the book up and ran my eyes over detached lines uninterestedly because carelessly: at last
I came to a poem ("24"—page 242 Thayer & Eldridge edition) that brought me
to a stand-still and as I read and reread the lines I felt—I, the
conventional young man, or
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loc.01085.002_large.jpgboy, if you
will—but it was a "man flushed and full blooded who stood naked, body and soul,
before me. I went back to the beginning, I have read and reread carefully, I do
not understand you all in all fully, but I recognize the manliness of you, the power
you possess, the strength of mind and limb—and, meter of conventional ideas in the lines and
feet of conventional poetry as I am. I feel how weak and
pitiful physically and mentally I must look to the better, the
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loc.01085.005_large.jpgstronger part of
me—my dear sir, I cannot analyze my feelings, had any one told me that my
blood would
leap, my soul cry out at the poems of a man, as blood and soul and heart spring at some
glorious aspect of nature, I should have laughed at him—But I feel while
reading you (not your book, but you) as though I were let loose in some grand rugged place where I
had never thought to be, and all around teeming with pre Adamite strangeness
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majesty—This is just you and myself. I cannot help writing you. I do not know
if you will read anything I say, whether my name is a familiar or unfamiliar
one to you,—but at least I am and must be hereafter one who "loves you
secretly" in his heart, and openly to the world—
At least it must be something to you to have a man say that you have done him good,
physically and spiritually
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loc.01085.009_large.jpggood. It cannot
be so much a matter of indifference to you that in all gratitude I offer my tender
thanks and changed belief and admiration. I have taken "from your lips" the kiss,
and with all my heart and soul return it to you. Believe that I shall study you more
and more, and if ever the day comes that I may give you the hearty and true hand
grasp, and look in your eyes and in your face, even though my own tongue is silent
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understand my soul and that I am faithfully your friend