To Get Betimes in Boston Town
TO GET BETIMES IN BOSTON TOWN.
1TO get betimes in Boston town, I rose this morningearly; Here's a good place at the corner—I must stand and
see the show. 2Clear the way there, Jonathan! Way for the President's marshal! Way for the gov-
ernment cannon! Way for the Federal foot and dragoons—and the appa-
ritions copiously tumbling. 3I love to look on the stars and stripes—I hope the fifes
will play Yankee Doodle. 4How bright shine the cutlasses of the foremost
troops! Every man holds his revolver, marching stiff through
Boston town. 5A fog follows—antiques of the same come limping, Some appear wooden-legged, and some appear ban-
daged and bloodless. 6Why this is indeed a show! It has call'd the dead
out of the earth! The old grave-yards of the hills have hurried to see! Phantoms! phantoms countless by flank and rear! Cock'd hats of mothy mould! crutches made of mist! Arms in slings! old men leaning on young men's
shoulders! 7What troubles you, Yankee phantoms? What is all
this chattering of bare gums? Does the ague convulse your limbs? Do you mistake
your crutches for fire-locks, and level them? [ begin page 196 ]
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8If you blind your eyes with tears, you will not see the President's marshal; If you groan such groans you might balk the govern-
ment cannon. 9For shame, old maniacs! Bring down those toss'd
arms, and let your white hair be; Here gape your great grand-sons—their wives gaze at
them from the windows, See how well-dress'd—see how orderly they conduct
themselves. 10Worse and worse! Can't you stand it? Are you
retreating? Is this hour with the living too dead for you? 11Retreat then! Pell-mell! To your graves! Back! back to the hills, old limpers! I do not think you belong here, anyhow. 12But there is one thing that belongs here—shall I
tell you what it is, gentlemen of Boston? 13I will whisper it to the Mayor—he shall send a
committee to England; They shall get a grant from the Parliament, go with a
cart to the royal vault—haste! Dig out King George's coffin, unwrap him quick from
the grave-clothes, box up his bones for a
journey; Find a swift Yankee clipper—here is freight for you,
black-bellied clipper, Up with your anchor! shake out your sails! steer
straight toward Boston bay. 14Now call for the President's marshal again, bring
out the government cannon, Fetch home the roarers from Congress, make another
procession, guard it with foot and dragoons. [ begin page 197 ]
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15This centre-piece for them:
Look! all orderly citizens—look from the windows, women! 16The committee open the box, set up the regal ribs,
glue those that will not stay, Clap the skull on top of the ribs, and clap a crown on
top of the skull. 17You have got your revenge, old buster! The crown
is come to its own, and more than its own. 18Stick your hands in your pockets, Jonathan—you
are a made man from this day; You are mighty cute—and here is one of your
bargains.