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"But, Horace, the seriosity, gravity, of my case—we are not to forget—we may easily lose sight of it.

Indeed—that is my great triumph, stand-by, these days."

, who has been here to pay me a visit, says that I am mistaken, that Browning is my man, only that I

I do not assent to that—Corson does not know my appetite and my capacity as well as I know it myself.

I have almost made up my mind to make some use of the themes myself, though I don't know as I'll ever

get to them—so many physical obstacles drop into my pathway these years."

"Yes indeed—lots of 'em—lots of 'em: in fact, some of my best friends in the hospitals were probably

Give my love to all the ferry boys—all of 'em! And how are you yourself, Danny?"

They wrote back that they must have something—must have something over my name.

thoughtfully, as he looked in a fixed way at me: "But, Horace," he said, "this book quite revises, recasts, my

No—he is not my man.

In other respects he conceded my corrections.

I at once wrote, discountenancing the whole thing, in the strongest English the language and my command

It is a part of our blood—my brother George—others of our best friends—alive, resenting it.

And this, taken with my natural disgust, easily disposed of the question for me.

I just received the following letter from the Post Office (from Baker): New York, March 7th 1891 My dear

Told him my facsimiles had not arrived yet. "That is too bad, and yours the most important of all!"

condition, "He is undoubtedly on the down road again: I detected impairment in the few days between my

Give her my love & sympathy, poor dear girl!

It is my intention to mount and frame it, and have it on the most conspicious wall of my house where

Tom spoke of Hodgins as a friend of Bucke, W. calling Bucke "my best friend."

Sat so for the greater part of my half-hour's stay—closing the window finally himself.

I showed him where he had put it yesterday after my reading.

till I am interfered with—till my freedom is invaded: and what I offer for the individual—to me as a

W. said: "I am glad to hear you say that: it confirms my own theory: I never lived out my idea: I let

Do you understand my bad English?

s on my way to Germantown, as he expected.

Then I remembered that he was my mother's son, my brother—not my counsellor.

Now my voice is stronger. I ask—why will you not speak to me?

For the first time I act as my nature prompts me.

Farewell, my dear friend.

Late (my mother says after she had gone to bed) Warren rang bell.

Wallace Warren was very frank to tell my mother his conviction that W.

My suggestions. Harned wondering why no word from Bucke. No callers.

sickness but will be on hand at funeral please telegraph me arrangements.Francis H Williams New York 27 My

"I can't get adjusted to it: the thought of our separation—of my personal helplessness: then my memory

I struggle against my own inner convictions."

My dear Walt,This morning I had occasion to call at the house of a Mr.

But I worked my way through it. He'd say: "Don't give up," laughing.

own personality (things seen through my eyes and what my vision brings)—a book full enough of mosaic

I did not attempt to show him my letters.

It is impossible to say why I have not done so—pardon my procrastination, which, with regard to my private

correspondence, I am afraid is one of my sins.

Here at my work I am delighted. I like my work—I am partly on the Ledgers & partly at the Counters.

I intend giving our Clarke permission to quote from my Notes but my feeling in regard to the letter is

His question put to me some time ago—how does W. take my question?

Harned, my sister Gussie, the boy, Clifford, along. W. in bright mood. Talked fluently.

Picked up a box of candies which he gave to my sister.

In the midst of some talk, W. turned to my sister: "And the baby?"

Then: "Yes: yes: Priestley is my man too—my man as you present him, but not my man in the aspect these

W. said: "Tom, all of you are too good to me: my friends: you give me so much without my asking I'd feel

Then, "My friends must understand that: it is one of the bottom principles of 'Leaves of Grass.'"

On the table was the appendix to "Good-Bye My Fancy." I picked it up and examined.

I replied, "I am only glancing at it—my impression is a good one: I always like your personal chit-chat

To my assent proceeding, "And yet there are some who would doubt all that—doubt it utterly.

He had just been turned on my arrival, so I went in, the room black enough.

But he must have been awake, tiptoeing it as I did, and knew my step or somehow knew I was here.

After he recovered he finished my name and we shook hands.

On my questioning saying, "I have spent a dreadful day, seemingly to get deeper and deeper into the mire

and pressing my other hand, which he held.Johnston sends me a couple of Bolton papers in which are notes

Adding then by the way of definiteness: "But I have just finished my breakfast—relished it: relished

Bucke said no: "I would rather not have my name used at all in that connection: O'Connor has a doctor

: "You don't: instead of doing me harm it does me good to have you fellows here: it lifts me out of my

I've found the Chamberlin letter: since you brought it back I got it messed away among the papers on my

My friend Baxter sent us his copy of your big book with notes, one or two, from you, pasted in.You do

Upon my expression of opinion that I supposed from the tone of the letter he had enclosed a draft, W.

Called my attention to fact that the Courier of Friday printed his poem in full.

"It was before my eyes all the time I was writing."

And to my response "Yes—yellow"—he assented—"Yes—a yellow, with a tinge of brown."

He endorsed my plan—to print his verse and signature on one side of a big green card, and on the other—menu

Warrie quickly asked the stranger—"Where's my watch?" "Why, in your pocket, of course."

I endorse Bruno—he is my man—our man: his maxims, too.

W. was not at home on my coming, but in ten minutes or so was wheeled up by Ed.

I gave him my father's translation of the German article.

I stayed but briefly—long enough to know his condition, to deliver my own messages and get his.

I was a good deal uncertain about the title until your unanimous vote removed my uncertainty."

My first experience with that sort of a character was an unfortunate one: it has become a mere memory

a man I think I of all men doubt: a pious, sanctimonious, unctuous, oily individual: his victim was my

—or something or other of that sort—contracted with my father, who was a builder, for the construction

It was a sample case—I could match it with many incidents that have come my way since.

"I am afraid if I don't pay my debt to Hicks now I will never do it at all.

And it is a sort of filial debt, too—a debt I owe my father, who loved Hicks."

He said: "On my bad days I like to kiss you good bye.

He grew very quiet, looked very gently into my face, pressed my hand, and turned to the window.I copy

I can't for my poor self at any rate. But never mind this.

I was in Germantown all day, going there of set purpose to display my manuscript to Clifford and have

him criticise my plans.

leaves,—"I have heard so often of this book—been spoken to so often about it—it is time I had it in my

"It is one of my books there on the floor."

"I have discarded my old comb and brush—though I rarely use a brush.

I asked W. if my observation of W.'

It has always been so: it is a part of my ancestral quality persisting and saving.

Smooth my way—with all the aches and pains I've had for a week!

Asked me to have my sister Gussie prepare him some mutton—described how, &c., with amusing detail.

This is my Harned day. I wonder if the Harned Sundays will ever return?"

Was very particular to have me keep up my writing to O'Connor and Bucke.

He called my attention to it. I asked: "Are you sure this is not a love letter?

My mother used to tell us often about my father—that his love for the youngsters and for cattle was marvellous—simply

then explained, "I have a spice of wickedness in me—a vein that makes me rejoice to tell Bucke of my

—"It was to distinguish me from my father originally and then the name held.

Whitman does not surprise or startle me: I take quite naturally to that, too—though my friends, young

I had no bars up against my freedom—always went whither I list.

Reached Camden 8:15, and after breakfast and a bath, and examining my mail, down to W.'s.

Among various letters come since my going away was this: Elmwood, Cambridge1st June, 1891Dear Sir,I very

greatly regret that, owing to an accident, your letter, though it reached my house, did not reach me

I should have been glad to add my felicitations & good wishes to yours had it been possible.Faithfully

I shall put it in my report as a footnote. W. advised simply, "Do as you will."

was originally intended as a sort of barricade: I set it up to hold back the desperate assaults of my

a condition of half-suspended life"—adding: "Do you just keep things moving until I get balanced on my

Stopped at Osler's on my way to church. Not at home.

I hate to have anybody around, right in my room, watching me. Maurice, do I need to be watched?"

I trust that you have not so far forgotten my article as to think my meaning was that attributed to me

When I get better or well enough—on my feet again—I shall have him come over and talk while I listen.

it again: "I did a lot of that work in the hospitals: it was in a sense the most nearly real work of my

farewell for [the] present, and I pray that God may be with you, and though we are strangers I send my

As to L. of G.Leaves of Grass: "It does not seem like my book—it is your book, too: anybody's book who

I guess something—a lot—can be said on the conservative side: my contention is not that much cannot be

I am sure that if I had my legs and a boat, it would be a day for me."

My advice about that fellow would be, to let him alone—let him severely alone.

And again, "My charge would be—drop him—he is not worth a word."

W. said, "I shall write Doctor—send my letter over by Warrie (Warrie will undoubtedly go—undoubtedly)

I usually make my address as full as I know.

W. answering my inquiry said: "No, I didn't go down stairs today.

it won't hurt me: my caution, you remember, is six and over!

I quoted this: "I knew of the agents that emptied and broke my brother." "Yes," said W.

I reminded W. of one of my sisters similarly afflicted.

Here—take this bunch with my blessing and be happy.

"The text is a little mixed up," W. said of it apologetically: "My mind is not now-a-days a perfect machine

"My brain often takes speed and is away—gets rein-free and flies without will or plan—and I am helpless

"My whole soul revolts against that line: my very first feeling was one of utter disgust."

My place in Washington was a peculiar one—my reasons for being there, my doing there what I did do.

I do not think I quite had my match.

that I would not adopt some of his suggestions, but always comforted himself with saying, "It's not my

He admitted he had been a little twitted by my letter (the first), but I readily made that easy.

(W. says, "That is right: that fixes me right in my average personality.")

And my trip profited, with respect to the task I am to set about and a better acquaintanceship with her

the rest of my days in that vicinity.

happiest hours have been spent there—some of my freest hours."

Upon my remonstrance he said: "I will make it a religion to like the new man."

He took it out of my hand, scanned it, handed it back.

"If I die in the midst of things you may fall heir to all my work: think of that: all my work!"

—though I doubt if you can catch a good 200 lbs., which I believe I still weigh, in spite of my emaciation

then to my affirmative response: "If I keep on in this way I shall by and by have a Hebrew clientage—and

And he said still again: "And all my Hebrew friends are turning out to be among the young—you would call

would make my blood as thin as possible, and so lessen the arterial strain.

Well, my time has come—that is all. You see, I am somewhat of a fatalist!"

I take it my spirit sense of your condition is not likely to fail after all.

For all, accept my friendliest good wishes."Direct, W. W. Solicitor's office.

I get published, in spite of my enemies." "Your enemies never really hurt you?"

Stopped in on my way to the city. All well there.

But he resented my explanation. Insisted that the cords were short.

It is your very worst habit: it gives my vanity, complacency, many a jar!"

The affair" (my dismissal) "was settled upon before I knew it."

What instinct ever drove him to my desk?

Showed him the beginnings of my Lippincott's piece, with which he expressed his content.

He seemed to see an inquiry in my looks. "It don't go very well," he remarked. "I am not up to it."

I took the two Ingersoll articles out of my pocket and gave them to him.

Give him my regards."

They set my head in a whirl—mixes me all up—and besides hurts my throat.

I am not sure but that is the point—and my deficiency!" Passing along, "Who have you seen today?"

.: "I suppose—anything—any change to a man in my condition is comfort." After a pause.

He held my hand warmly, and I could feel its grasp loosen and fasten from time to time.H.L.T.: "I sent

He held my hands tightly—twice saying almost in a whisper, "God bless you, boy: God bless you—bless you

Chubb could not have heard, and it shook my heart. Then the final good night and kiss and escape.

was his parting and my own was silence.Now again to Philadelphia and not back to 328 till ten.

"Yes: that seems to be my life: from the bed to the chair: back to the bed again.

to which he said at once: "I'm never in fact conscious of it: I've never been so bad but my sickness

Eldridge thinks that my publishers are dealing honestly with me.

When one of my books was published they sold the first six months 733 copies.

"I was hoping I'd put my hand on something more significant.

"No," he said to my question, "I have not read it all—it is solid reading"—his tone implying "too solid

I had my much-marked pocket copy of Leaves of Grass with me.

Fragments of our talk will betray themselves as I discuss points with W. in days after my return.

He did not move at my entrance nor did I disturb him. Then to Philadelphia. (Mrs.

This is now my own personal, authenticated volume—sealed, signed, made as it stands, by me, to so remain

It is my ultimate, my final word and touch, to go forth now, for good or bad, into the world of the future

left with him.Speaking again of his condition, "I am weak—weak—weak, but everybody is so kind to me, my

Give my love to Walt.

—Dear comrade, I still live here as a hospital missionary after my own style, & on my own hook—I go every

I have cut my beard short & hair ditto: (all my acquaintances are in anger & despair & go about wringing

Then around my majestic brow around my well-brimmed felt hat—a black & gold cord with acorns.

I had to give up health for it—my body—the vitality of my physical self: oh!

My body?

Was up to see my father and the picture, with which now he expressed himself perfectly satisfied, the

"I shall make my best show to read them." Asked me about temperature—news, etc.

greeted each other lovingly and he said at once, "I am here still, dear, you see—and trying to eat my

The O'Connor home was my home: they were beyond all others—William, Nelly—my understanders, my lovers

Take my darling dear mother: my dear, dear mother: she and I—oh!

oh my, hardly the Leaves!

general: they were my unvarying partisans, my unshakable lovers—my espousers: William, Nelly: William

so like a great doing out of the eternal—a withering blast to my enemies, a cooling zephyr to my friends